The Last Month Has Forever Changed Me…
It’s been a while, I know, so let me catch you up 😉
June 21 will forever be imbed into my mind and soul. It was the day that changed the course of everything for me as I knew it and my journey was completely shifted. To be totally honest, I had been feeling a stirring and unsettled spirit for close to 2 years. So I knew something was coming but NEVER in a million years would I have guessed THIS would have been it.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE share this…if it can help just ONE woman then this journey will have been worth it. 1. Wash your body with your hands2. Get an army of amazing people around you because you NEVER know what the road may lead to ❤️3. PrayI realize it’s not Wednesday 🤣 clearly my brain is mush, lol!!! Monday, Wednesday…I mean they’re pretty close, right?!?
Posted by My Think Fit on Monday, June 25, 2018
I had felt a lump on Thursday night in the shower…I had been washing with my hands since getting rid of my loofah (you’ll see why in that video above) and I had not ever felt this before. Today I am SO thankful I threw that loofah away and NEVER will I use them consistently again.
At my early Friday morning workout, I had my friend (also my health care provider) feel and give me confirmation it wasn’t normal and we should have it looked at. By mid-morning I was in an imaging center getting my first ever mammogram…which was diagnostic followed by ultrasound and conversation with teh radiologist. I had an appointment set for the following Monday at 7:30am to get a needle biopsy of several areas. As I walked out into the hallway from the office, I nearly collapsed as I held a brochure in my hand reading “introducing your Cancer Nurse Navigator”
The day I had the diagnostic images done was completely devastating…as a 38 year old mom of 3 it was something I just never saw coming and would not have guessed. But my girlfriends rallied around me and before I knew it, we were poolside with laughs and tears and having the time of our lives.
On Monday I went in to get the biopsy done and asked the radiologist to shoot me straight…and her reply was that she did in fact believe it to be breast cancer. When I got the actual call of the diagnosis on that Wednesday, I already kind of knew so it wasn’t a sense of shock. It was heart breaking and a reality check but it was something I had been anticipating for several days. That same day, my husband and I met with a breast surgeon to determine what our next steps would be and scheduled an appointment with an oncologist. With a diagnosis of Stage 2 Invasive Ductal Carcinoma labeled as HER2-, ER+, PR +, the treatment plan was laid out as 16 rounds of chemo followed by surgery and then radiation.
Telling the kids about what was going on…over snow cones 🙂
We also sat the kids down and explained to them what was happening and why mommy had been going to so many appointments in the preceding days. You can read more on that HERE There were tears and smiles and a reminder that God totally has this and we will fight this as a team because we are #teamtuman!!!!
I’ll be honest and tell you that the following days were both terrifying and peaceful…scared of the journey ahead and yet at peace knowing that this is what my past 2 years of feeling a sense of something stirring was all about. I KNEW at that moment that God had hand picked me for this journey.
Now, that does NOT mean that I did not have complete melt downs and cry until the tears couldn’t flow anymore, it does NOT mean that I didn’t still have fear of what was to come, it does NOT mean that I didn’t question everything in my existence as to how this happened…BUT at the end of it all, I was ok. I realized I had more support than I could EVER have imagined. I realized that I was already helping people in their faith journey to take that step and get even closer to their creator. I realized that being a mom and wife were the single most important parts of my life. I realized that helping others and inspiring people to live their absolute best life was my purpose and I needed to keep pursuing it.
The worst week was probably the one leading up to my first chemo treatment…it was full of appointments and scans and procedures and left me with so much fear and uncertainty that I could hardly deal. The worst one was the port insertion. I always cry when I get put under sedation, lol, it’s like I do totally fine while they’re prepping me but once they start to take me back to the OR, I lose it. And this time was no different, but yet VERY different. See the times before were for surgery or procedures to make feel better. This was not. This was a procedure to put something into my body that would allow chemotherapy to be injected into me to treat CANCER. Y’all. Let that sink in for a minute.
As they rolled me back to the OR, I was terrified. Was this going to hurt? What the heck was I doin there? Why was this happening to me? Am I really going to live? Can I really beat this thing? What will it feel like afterward? Oh my gosh I ’m getting ready to start chemo…what is that like? I mean my mind would NOT stop!! And the tears would not end.
I admitted to the nurses and staff that I was scared to death, one of them cried along with me and she assured me I would beat this thing and she couldn’t wait to have me back to take my port out.
Once the procedure was done, it was a relief but hOLY MOLY was I sore!!! The strangest sensation and super sore.
The day after getting my port…yes my hair got dyed pink by my friends too 🙂
Wednesday was ‘chemo class’ where the physician’s assistant went over all of what to expect with starting chemo…I could handle all that she was throwing at me but then she got to the part about wigs and head coverings and it hit me. I didn’t LOOK sick, I looked fine, just like ME. But what happens when I lose my hair? When it becomes REAL that this is actually happening?!?! Everyone who looks at me will know I am sick
Thursday, July 12 finally rolled around…it was the BIG DAY!!! Day 1/16 treatments of chemo and my husband would be right by my side. We woke up to a yard sign of #teamtuman which was so amazing and so reassuring that our battle was underway!!!
Again, I seem to cry at fear of the unknown and this day was no different. As the doctor spoke to us before we went in for the treatment, the tears just came. Same as when we started in the infusion room and the nurse started explaining the new regimen to us…just tears flowing. But by SUCH a blessing, the medical team was incredible and having my husband by my side made the whole day so much better.
Round 1 of chemo going down…
Round 1 of chemo was DONE…such a good thing yet daunting thing to have in the back of my mind. It took 7 days for me to come back to life…to come back from nausea for days on end, fatigue that is just unexplainable, anxiety beyond belief, constipation (yep, I went there!), chest tightness, and discouragement. That’s the reality of it, that’s how I handled it. But once that 7 days was up it was like the heavens parted and life was amazing again…and I wanted to make the ABSOLUTE best of it!!! I even chopped my hair…I mean I knew it was about to start falling out so why not take control of the ONE thing I could still do?!? It was fun to sport something different for a while 😉
So there you have it…the update on what June and July looked like for me and why it might seem I ’ve been a bit absent. You can follow along my journey on social media where I try to keep everyone updated as much as possible.
Yes, I have been absent physically, but mentally my mind is still so focused on sharing my love for helping others, on helping YOU on your journey. If you haven’t taken your METABOLISM QUIZ make sure to check it out!!! From there you’ll be able to gain access to additional fat loss tips from me and even have the opportunity to take my online course!!! Like I said, I’m not going anywhere and my heart is still 100% focused on helping YOU to find your perfect fat loss solution